Tuesday, November 3, 2009

7 Ways to Build Trust in a Relationship and Save Your Relationship Before It's Too Late

Before it's too late, you need to save your relationship and that means finding ways to build trust in your relationship.  Check out these tips for improving the level of trust between you and your spouse or partner before it's too late:

1.  Be Predictable

Spontaneity may be the spice of life, but if you're looking to build trust to save your relationship, then you need to be more predictable than you are varied.  Be consistent and steady and show your spouse or partner that you can be counted on to behave a certain way.  This doesn't mean not surprising them with a nice dinner or taking them on a spontaneous outing.  It just means not altering your primary mode of behavior much.

2.  Be True to Your Word

Give your spouse or partner a reason to trust what you say.  Match your body language to your words and match your words to your actions.  Your partner or spouse will see right through you if you're lying, so learn to be honest in order to build up trust in the relationship.

3.  Believe in Your Partner or Spouse

Remind yourself of what it was in your partner or spouse that you fell in love with.  Focus on those competencies of theirs that made you respect them.  Having a fundamental belief in them and then respectfully and lovingly communicating it to them is one of the most powerful things you can do to build trust.

4.  Do Not Keep Secrets

This seems obvious, but it's much easier said than done.  The truth is, secrets destroy trust between you.  You need to focus on being as open and honest as possible.  And give your partner or spouse the respect to do the same.  Rather than focusing your energy on keeping certain things hidden or buried, work on building up the trust in your relationship.  Chances are those secrets will come out eventually and if the relationship is truly strong, they won't affect your relationship anyway.

5.  Articulate Your Needs to Each Other

Discuss openly exactly what it is you feel is lacking in the relationship or that you as an individual need in order to thrive.  Then open your ear to your partner or spouse and really hear what they have to say as well.  Don't be selfish, just be honest.

6.  Don't Be Afraid to Say No.

You can't be respected or trusted if you can never say no, so to build trust in your relationship, you have to have the courage to say no to anything your partner or spouse demands that you feel is unreasonable or that's pushing you too hard to be something you are not.  You have to keep your own individual personality alive to build the relationship up into something stronger, so learn to compromise, but not submit.

7.  Work Through the Pain in Order to Grow

Working at a relationship can be difficult and painful at times.  But just like any other form of growth, the pain is just a part of it and it does eventually subside and pass.  And it only makes you and your relationship stronger.

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